Must Have Been A Part-Time Thief

(A lady comes in and I hurriedly wipe the table. She eats, finishes, and is about to leave.)

Customer: “Have you seen my car keys? You must have swept it off the table when you were cleaning it when I just got here. Go check the garbage.”

(I go check the bus pans.)

Me: “No, they aren’t in the bus pans. Would they be in your purse?”

Customer: “No, you must have them. Let me go check your garbage.”

Me: “No, we can’t allow you to go through our garbage. The back of house is out of bounds.”

Customer: “Well, someone must have taken my keys. Go check the garbage again.”

(At this point, a coworker goes out to the parking lot and notices her keys still in the lock of her car door.)

Coworker: “Are these your keys?”

Customer: “Where did you find them?”

Coworker: “They were on your door…”

Customer: “Obviously, someone stole them from me and put them out there. My car could have been stolen!”

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