Must Be Herd Of Hearing

| PA, USA | Working | March 14, 2014

(I’m the weird one in this story. I’m a massage therapist working at a chain location. All employees are given one free massage a month on the company. One of the receptionists has booked with me one evening. She has her hair dyed a vibrant red. I’m am somewhat of a Brony, but as far as I know she is unfamiliar with the ‘My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic’ show.)

Me: *finishing pre-massage intake* “What kind of pressure do you want?”

Coworker: “Deep tissue. Just not so deep that it’s painful, if possible.”

Me: “Okay. And lastly, what color hair do you want when I’m finished?”

Coworker: “… Excuse me?”

Me: “You said you wanted to try a scalp massage this time, right?”

Coworker: “Yeah.”

Me: “Well by working the scalp and manipulating the follicles I can alter your hair color. Maybe make it a deeper red.”

Coworker: “I don’t… What?”

Me: “Or maybe give you a few highlights?”

Coworker: *stutters a bit, not sure if I’m being serious*

Me: *completely straight face* “Look, in order to give a good massage you have to get empathic a bit and in touch with what the other person is feeling. Massage is friendship. And friendship, is magic.”

Coworker: “I don’t think… Are you… huh?”

Me: “Oh for the love of… I’m just screwing with you!”

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