Mr. Gossip From Across The Street

(I’m on maternity leave with my first child. My husband is going away for a week on a work trip. I decide to stay with my mom during that time, so I can get some proper rest in between caring for the baby. My mom lives a 40-minute drive from us. I arrive at my mother’s house with my newborn daughter and a ton of stuff. You know, staying somewhere with a newborn requires a lot of logistics — much because of my inexperience, as well. We unload the car in the driveway. Earlier today, I bought a secondhand baby bed online from someone in my mother’s region. I reasoned that it will be handy for sleepovers, as it can be used until my daughter is about four. So, we drive off to collect it and drag it into my mom’s house, too. Fast forward to later that week. My mom comes back from grocery shopping, looking a bit puzzled.)

Mom: “I ran into [Friend from the other side of the neighborhood] when shopping.”

Me: “Oh, that’s nice.”

Mom: “Yeah, he asked about you.”

Me: “Really?”

Mom: “Yeah, he asked if you were ‘staying with me again.’ I told him, ‘Well, yes, she is,’ but found his phrasing a bit funny. Then, he continued, ‘Yeah, things don’t always work out so well.’”

Me: “Oh, my God!” *facepalm*

Mom: “Yes, our neighbor apparently saw us unloading everything and made up a story about how you two broke up. He’s telling everybody who wants to hear.”

(I made sure to make out at length with my husband in the middle of the driveway when he “came back to me.” My mom had a firm talk with the neighbor about jumping to conclusions. We’re still happily married. It is now a running joke in our family that I broke up AGAIN when sleeping over at my mom’s.)