Mother Is Parking Mad

(I’d just started driving to school. After class I’m giving a classmate a lift home. But when I get to my car I notice something’s not right.)

Me: “Hmmm. My mother has been over here and moved the car.”

Classmate: “How do you know?”

Me: “The stick shift thingy isn’t how I left it. She must not have liked the way I parked.”

Classmate: “So…you think your mother has come all the way over here today just to move the car a few inches? You’re weird.”

(When I get home:)

Me: “Did you come over and move the car today?”

Mother: “Yes, you were parked a little crooked.”

(My mother’s actually perfectly sane.)