The Mother Of All Bad Phrasing

, , , | Related | June 22, 2017

(My brother was supposed to start a load of laundry early this afternoon and forgot, so he ends up bringing them upstairs for Mom to fold late in the evening. Granted, he screwed up, but Mom is acting like a five-year-old, pouting and throwing stuff, and I’m getting tired of hearing it. I’ve offered to help however I can, but she’d rather be angry. Then she discovers some of the clothes are still damp.)

Mom: “[Brother] didn’t check whether these god-d*** clothes were dry!”

Me: “I can take them back downstairs and dry them again—”

(She throws a pair of underwear across the room. I retrieve them.)

Mom: “Son of a b***!”

(She ignores my offer to help, gathers up all the laundry even though most of it did get dry, and stomps downstairs to dry it again. My step-dad and I are left upstairs.)

Me: “… her words, man. Not mine.”

(I’ve never understood why moms call their own sons son-of-a-bitch, but in this case it fit. Mom must have been way out of line because my step-dad admitted he thought the same thing.)

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