Monitoring (Lack Of) Progress

(I get a call from a customer saying that there is something wrong with her server.)

Me: “Ma’am, is the screen frozen?”

Caller: “Yes, it is.”

Me: “All right, go ahead and manually turn it off for me.”

Caller: “All right, it’s off.”

(This is odd, as it normally takes up to five minutes for the server to turn off.)

Me: “Okay. Go ahead and turn it back on, and let me know when it’s back up.”

Caller: *without skipping a beat* “It’s back up, and still frozen.”

Me: “Okay, ma’am. Are you actually turning off the monitor or the computer?”

Caller: “I don’t know! I’m no computer wiz!”