Money Talks, No Money Talks Rudely

(I work at a large grocery store chain, often as the guy watching self checkout. It’s a busy sort of night, all the other lanes have a line, and self check has three people there, when a man shows up with an armful of items. I watch him proceed to run each item by itself, in separate transactions, in order to get $100 cash back each time. After the seventh item, the machine starts resorting to giving out smaller bills for a portion of the change, and then on the eight item it gives the man an error message.)

Customer: *immediately turns to me* “What sort of system are you running here?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir?”

Customer: “It’s not giving me my money! What sort of system are you running?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. Let me check it.”

(I walk up to the machine and log in; all the while this man is standing so close I can feel his breath on my neck. Just as I thought, the machine is overdrawn.)

Me: “No more money left in the machine. Here, let me take you over to my drawer.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! How can there not be money in there?!”

(I look at him, honestly unsure whether or not he’s joking.)

Me: “Well, sir, we fill it up a certain amount each night.”

(I make a quick call for one of my managers and hit the button to call for a drawer opening, and while I’m waiting for that I put the closed sign on his register.)

Customer: “So? What’s your point?”

(He’s getting more and more angry the longer it takes me to open my drawer. I can’t technically do it myself; it requires approval, and since we’re pretty busy it’s taking longer than usual.)

Me: “Well, sir, you’re not the only one getting cash back out of that machine, and you got over seven hundred dollars.”

Customer: “Are you going to give me my f****** money or not?!”

Me: “I’m trying, sir, but I have to wait on my boss to open my drawer.”

Customer: *starts fidgeting, and glaring at me* “Just give me my f****** money!”

Boss: *finally shows up* “Hey, [My Name], what seems to be the problem here?”

Customer: “This a** refuses to give me my money!”

(I quickly get out of the manager’s way so she can open my drawer, and she hands him his money which he practically rips from her hands.)

Customer: “F****** finally! You a**holes really need to learn to put the g**d*** customer first!” *kicks a nearby self check machine on his way out* “And fix these d*** things!”

(Everyone, including me, my boss, and the other customers in self checkout watch him go.)

Me: “What do you think?”

Boss: “He’s on something.”

Customer #2: “Or he’s a d**k.”

Customer #3: “Both.”

Customer #2: “Oh, yeah, or both. Probably both.”