Mondays And Medicine And Babies, Oh My

(After delivering medicine and receiving payment by a customer, I’m ready to leave so I can go home.)

Me: “All right, Ms. [Customer], have a great evening.”

Customer: “All right, I’ll probably be calling you on Mon… Oh, wait, y’all are closed Monday.”

Me: “No, ma’am, we’re open on Monday, same hours as usual.”

Customer: “Oh, right, tomorrow is Saturday; that’s what I meant.”

Me: “No, ma’am, we’re open tomorrow, as well. We are open every day except Sunday.”

Customer: “My stomach has been hurting. I’m gonna take some of the medicine now.”

(The medicine in question is a cream for itching/discomfort on the skin.)

Me: “Uh…”

Customer: “You know, I don’t have any kids, so I can buy myself anything I want.”

Me: “Oh, well, that sounds really nice.”

Customer: “I used to live in New York, you see.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

Customer: “I had to go to the movies to see how a baby came out.”

Me: “Pardon?”

Customer: “I’ve never been married, so I had to go to the movies to see how a baby came out.”

Me: “Oh, really?”

Customer: “Okay.”

Me: “Okay, Ms. [Customer], have a nice evening.”