Mom Needs A Tablet To Write This Stuff Down

My mother bought my daughter a laptop for school and speech therapy. Despite being five at the time — seven years old now — my daughter takes pretty good care of it, and nowadays, I make sure it has a spot and its charger does, as well. My daughter also has had her share of tablets: two that died out after getting their money’s worth, and one that for some reason stopped responding to her finger.

My mother is asking me about it one night.

Mom: “Hey, where is that tablet I got her?”

Me: “The old Windows one? That broke at [previous address]. Remember?”

Mom: “WHAT? I JUST BOUGHT THAT!”

Me: “No… you didn’t.”

Mom: Yes, I f****** did! It was $700!

Me: “None of her tablets has ever been that much.”

Mom: “The one with the keyboard!”

Me: “The old Windows one. Yeah, that’s the one that finally died after two years of use.”

Mom: “Where is her tablet?!”

Me: “Do you mean the ONN brand? Either in the house or car.”

She becomes very annoyed at this.

Me: “Do you mean her Switch? It’s in her room.”

Mom: “What the h*** is a Switch?!”

Me: “That pink console she had at Thanksgiving.”

Mom: “No! Her tablet I got off of [Website]!”

Me: “You mean her laptop?”

Mom: “Oh. Yeah. Where is it?!”

Me: “Corner of the kitchen table on its charger.”

Mom: “Okay.”

Dad: “How did you forget it was the laptop that was that much money?”

Me: “Had you said that first, I would have told you exactly.”

Mom: “Is it charged?”

Me: “What part of ‘on its charger’ did you not hear?”

Mom: “…”

Me: “I didn’t think your memory was that bad, Ma! Also, you bought that when the [health crisis] started… which was last year.”

Mom: “Oh…”

She looked around after that and I just started laughing. I try not to let arguments that she and I have get too much in the way because I know that in some cases, like this, my mother’s memory will not serve her well, or in any justice whatsoever.