Mocha With An Extra Snot

(I am working at a coffee shop and have recently started training a new barista hire. He’s a teenage boy whose parents come to visit him a lot while he’s working. His parents are very snotty and condescending. Their son seems a little bit spoiled and not used to work, but he is very pleasant with the staff and is improving quickly. One day, his parents come in while my coworker is away from the station, so I offer to take their order.)

New Hire’s Mom: “We’ll take a pumpkin muffin, and we want that heated, and a large mocha.”

Me: “Okay, and would you like your mocha latte hot or iced?”

New Hire’s Mom: *narrowing her eyes* “I want my mocha hot, no whipped cream!”

Me: “Okay, that will just take one minute.”

(I read back their order before I ring them up, fully and precisely, as we are required to do to catch any mistakes.)

Me: “So, that’s one muffin and one large mocha latte. That comes to [price].”

New Hire’s Mom: “NO, NO, NO! I said I want a MOCHA! MO-CHA! MO! CHA! Not a mocha latte!”

Me: “I don’t understand. Do you want it to be a mocha cappuccino?”

New Hire’s Mom: “No! I just want a mocha with no latte! Is that so hard for you to understand?!”

Me: “Ma’am, I think you don’t understand. A mocha is just shorthand for mocha latte; it’s the same thing. The latte part is the espresso and milk, and it becomes a mocha latte when you add chocolate. Without the latte, you would just have the two pumps of syrup.”

(I make the drink and demonstrate the steps for her, explaining how the drink is put together, and point out how the last step with the steam wand can either make it a latte or a cappuccino. When I try to give it to her, she glares at me.)

New Hire’s Mom: “I don’t want that! I asked for a mocha, and that’s wrong!”

Me: “I assure you, it’s the drink you ordered.”

New Hire’s Mom: “No, I always order a mocha. I never get a latte! You’re incompetent! I know what I drink! I get it all the time! My son is a barista here, and he’s better than you!”

Me: “I know, ma’am. I’m the one training him, and he’s still learning the job. I’ve been doing this for some time and know my way around a coffee.”

(My coworker, the new hire, emerges from the kitchen and walks over to greet his parents.)

Me: “Hey, would you like to show your parents what you’ve learned on the machine?”

New Hire: “Yeah! What would you like?”

New Hire’s Mom: *looks smugly at me* “We want a heated pumpkin muffin, and a large mocha.”

(I finish ringing them up. He goes to work and starts showing off, explaining why the fine ground espresso packed tightly makes the drink stronger, what the buttons are for, etc. He is being a great little salesman. The whole time he is demonstrating, his mom looks more and more embarrassed because he is mirroring what I’ve already showed her. When he is finished, I remind him.)

Me: “Don’t forget the last step before you serve!”

New Hire: *proudly* “Here you go, Mom! One mocha latte and one hot pumpkin muffin!”

New Hire’s Mom: *takes it and leaves, absolutely livid*

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