MMAY Hero!

(I’m a regular at a bar and know the bartenders well. One of them is a very attractive woman. She’s been complaining about a creepy guy who keeps coming in and hitting on her. He always ends up being shooed out of the way by other customers that actually want service, but he keeps coming back. I happen to be there on the last night he comes in.)

Guy: “Hey, sweetie! Miss me?”

Bartender: “What do you want to drink tonight?”

Guy: “Are you on the menu? Haha!”

Bartender: “No.”

(I start to stand to go over to her, if only to be a distraction because he’s much bigger than I am. Before I can get to the bar, though, another woman who looks like an Amazonian warrior steps up to it.)

Woman: *leans toward Guy* “If you don’t leave this young lady alone, I’m going to cut off your balls and make you eat them.”

Guy: “Hey!”

Woman: *almost yelling* “LEAVE.”

(The rest of the bar turned to look, and he left without another word, looking embarrassed. Both the bartender and I bought her drinks and found out that she was in town for an MMA tournament. She was very nice and visited the bar a few more times to make sure the creep stayed away. He did.)