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Mister Cellophane Should’a Been Your Name

, , , , | Working | December 27, 2022

I used to work as a supervisor at a department store in England before I got my current office-based job. It was a good move for me, and there were no hard feelings when I left; we even had a great leaving party, which is what makes this so bizarre.

I go back to the store occasionally to window shop and catch up with my old colleagues. This takes place eight months after I leave.

I’m talking with two of my former colleagues about random life things when a third comes up to us.

Coworker #3: “Hey, [My Name], haven’t seen you in ages! How’s things?”

Me: “Good, thanks! Been reading a few books lately.”

Coworker #3: “That’s nice. So, are you on holiday this week?”

Me: “No, why?”

Coworker #3: “Oh, day off? I feel like we haven’t worked together for months!”

[Coworker #1] and [Coworker #2] laugh.

Coworker #1: “I know, right?”

Coworker #3: “So, will you be giving out sales targets tomorrow, then?”

I realise she isn’t joking

Me: “I… got a new job?”

Coworker #3: “Oh, really? When are you going?”

Me: *Pauses* “Eight months ago.”

Coworker #3: “Really?”

Coworker #2: “You went to her leaving party!”

At that point, I just backed away and went to find some other people to talk to. But really, did I make so little impact that this colleague didn’t notice I was gone for eight months? Or was she really unobservant?

Mister Cellophane, The Early Years

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