Mischief Mismanaged

(My friend works at a store in the mall. She’s worked there for years when they hire a new manager. The manager tries to take over from the moment she is hired, changing everything and giving people useless tasks to complete. She even tries things like burning scented candles in the employee areas, which is a fire hazard, and trying to get all the team members to join hands in a “meditation circle” before every shift. My friend basically just ignores her and keeps doing her job. When the manager tries the bit with the scented candles, my friend douses them and turns them over to the mall security as a discovered fire hazard, and then reports to the manager that “someone” has burned candles, but that she’s taken care of it before they could start a fire. This all leads up the manager calling my friend in during the middle of a shift.)

Manager: “You’re not doing [tasks] like I told you to.”

Friend: “Are we closing early? Because we are only supposed to do that when we close.”

Manager: “I want us to keep doing it throughout the day.”

Friend: “Okay.”

(They both just stare at each other for several minutes.)

Manager: “Hand over your badge and shirt.”

Friend: “Excuse me?”

Manager: “You’ve been insubordinate since you started here.”

(Remember, my friend was hired years before this manager.)

Manager: “I’m not going to put up with it anymore. You’re fired!”

Friend: “Mm… no, I’m not.”

(And then, she just walked back out and went back to work. The manager kept sulking back in the office for the rest of that shift, but my friend didn’t hear another word about being fired from her after that. After telling us this, she admitted that she mainly wasn’t worried because she knew that that manager didn’t know anything about their computer system, so she couldn’t so much as change a schedule, much less fire anyone.)