Minimum Wage Means Minimum Understanding

(I’m looking for a second job to help pay the bills, and a big box hardware store is coming to town. I head to the job fair to try my chances. I fill out the application, I wait for a few minutes, and soon I’m escorted into a room for an interview. The interviewer is an old man who looks like he’s had a very long day. He starts going through my application.)

Interviewer: “Says here you went to university. I’m assuming you dropped out after a year or so because it was too hard, and that’s why you’re here.”

Me: “No. I graduated. I’ve got my degree. I just need a second job to help pay bills.”

Interviewer: “Yeah, right.”

(The interview continues like a typical job interview, until it’s my turn to ask questions.)

Me: “So, what kind of benefits do you offer?”

(The interviewer loses it.)

Interviewer: “I’m SICK and TIRED of you yokels in [My Town] asking that! THIS IS [Hardware Store] AND YOU ARE APPLYING FOR A MINIMUM WAGE JOB! What do you want from us? A pension plan? Healthcare? What does your TINY BRAIN expect for benefits?”

Me: “Mostly I was hoping for was an employee discount.”

(The interviewer was taken aback.)

Interviewer: “Oh. I… don’t know about discounts. I’ll find out.”

(He disappeared for about 10 minutes, and came back to tell me they have a 5% employee discount. Didn’t get the job.)