Megapixels and Megabusted

I worked in the Best Buy camera department when a Chinese family; mom, dad, a young man, and a young woman (maybe his girlfriend or sister), came in looking at the point-and-shoot cameras. They had pretty thick Chinese accents, so I assumed they were tourists or new immigrants.

I did my usual greeting and asked if they needed any help. Their only reply was:

Family: *In English.* “We are just looking.”

Then they went right back to talking amongst themselves in Cantonese.

For context, I’m 100% Chinese myself, fluent in Cantonese, and was born and raised in the US. I don’t have an accent in English, so I guess they assumed I couldn’t understand them.

What followed was their entire conversation… literally two feet from me, staring straight at me while they said this:

Chinese Guy: *In Cantonese.* “Hmm, what do you think of this camera?”

Chinese Girl: *In Cantonese.* “I don’t know anything. Why don’t you ask the employee?”

Chinese Guy: *In Cantonese.* “That b*stard? F*** him, he’s just gonna lie to us.”

I froze. They clearly thought I couldn’t understand a single word. They kept going:

Chinese Guy: *In Cantonese.* “This one looks cool. I wonder how fast it is. Do you know?”

Chinese Girl: *In Cantonese.* “I really don’t know. Just ask the employee.”

Chinese Guy: *In Cantonese.* “I already said f*** that b*stard. He’s just gonna lie anyway.”

I stood there in shock thinking: “Holy crap. They have NO idea I can understand every word.”

Finally:

Chinese Guy: *In Cantonese.* “How many megapixels is this camera?”

Chinese Girl: *In Cantonese.* “I really don’t know anything about cameras. Ask the employee.”

That’s when I decided I’d had enough. I looked straight at them and, in perfect Cantonese, said:

Me: *In Cantonese.* “That camera has five megapixels. It says so right on the card.”

Dead silence. Four blank faces. And then, in a flash, they thanked me awkwardly and practically ran out of the department. I’ve never seen a group of people evaporate that fast in my life.