Meeting Aunt Petunia

, , , , , , | Friendly | April 2, 2018

(I live in downtown, about two blocks away from our county fairgrounds. It’s Saturday night during a fair, and I have my windows open to let in the cooler air. I’m watching a Harry Potter movie. With my window open, you can see the television from the street. There’s a knock on my door. I open it to see a boy of about ten standing there.)

Me: “Um… Hello.”

Boy: “I want to watch the movie! Mom says to stay here while she goes out.”

Me: “Sorry, kid. I don’t know you. You need to go back to your mom.”

Boy: *pouts but leaves*

(Ten minutes later, there’s a pounding on my door.)

Mom: “I TOLD HIM HE COULD WATCH YOUR MOVIE! Just let him hang out here while I visit the bars! It’ll only be a couple hours.”

Me: “Lady, I don’t know you people, and you don’t know me. How do you know I’m not a child sex offender? If you want a free babysitter, call a friend or family member.”

Mom: “NO! It’s tourist season, and you all have to make us feel at home! Now, do your part and let him in!”

Me: “Yeah… No. Get out of here before I take your picture and send it to the cops. We’re a small town. They love hearing about neglected kids.”

(She scowled at me but finally left. The boy was still whining about wanting to watch my movie. There a lot of sickos out there, people! Keep an eye on your kids during big events.)

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