Medicated At 35,000 Feet

I work in an operations office for an airline. We don’t work with the general public, but we do support our airports and often get calls from airport agents across the network. Our number is private, but there are occasions when an airport employee gives it out instead of the actual call center. It’s a pretty quiet day until I get this call.

Me: “Thank you for calling [Team] for [Airline]. You’ve reached [My Name]; how can I help you?”

Elderly Caller: “Who?!”

Me: “You’ve reached [My Name] at [Airline], [Team]. How may I assist you?”

Elderly Caller: “Yes… can I take my medication with me?”

Me: *Pause* “I’m sorry, are you a passenger? This is an internal line; I can transfer you to the call center if you need assistance?”

Elderly Caller: “What?! No, dear, I just want to know which medication is better.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I don’t have an answer for you. Let me transfer you to the call center and, hopefully, they can assist you.”

Elderly Caller: “See, I’ve got the name brand, but the generic is cheaper and I want to make sure I take the stuff that won’t get taken away.”

Me: *Setting up the switchboard to transfer her call* “I understand, ma’am, but I don’t have the answer. Let me get someone on the line that hopefully should be able to assist.”

Elderly Caller: “I thought the airline would know. How do they not know? Why can’t this be easy? Why’d the government have to make this so complicated? It’s all those space aliens, I bet. The moment they blow up something like New York, everyone starts panicking all the time. Why don’t you guys know what you accept and what you don’t?”

Me: *Lets her finish her tirade* “I’m sorry about that, ma’am. I’ll transfer you to the call center right now for those answers you’re looking for.”

Elderly Caller: “Nah, don’t bother. I’ll just go with the name brand.” *Click*