Maybe It Got Chuck Norris’d
(A customer approaches the repair counter with a paper shopping bag, and I can hear stuff rattling around inside.)
Customer: “I bought this computer here, and it’s broken. I want to return it.”
(She dumps out the bag, and inside is a laptop that is broken completely in half.)
Customer: “It was like this when I opened the box.”
Me: “Okay… well, do you have the receipt and the original packaging?”
Customer: *hands me a receipt*
Me: “Ma’am, this receipt is from three months ago.”
Customer: “I know. I bought it three months ago but I just opened it today.”
Me: “Do you have the original packaging?”
Customer: “No, I threw it away.”
Me: “So, let me get this straight. You opened the box, three months after buying the computer, and the laptop was broken in half, so you threw out the box?”
Customer: “Yeah, I didn’t think I needed it.”
Me: “I really don’t think you can return this.”
Customer: “All right, but you can fix it. It’s still got a manufacturer warranty.”
Me: “I’m sorry, but manufacturer warranties don’t cover accidental damage, just defects.”
Customer: “But it’s not accidental damage! It was like this when I bought it!”
Me: “I find that really hard to believe, and so would anyone else. Nobody in their right mind would believe that it came out of the box like this.”
Customer: “But why would I lie about that?”
Me: “To get a free repair? I’m sorry, I just can’t do it. Your warranty does not cover accidental damage.”
Customer: *thinks for a moment* “But what if it wasn’t an accident?”
Me: “Excuse me?”
Customer: “What if it wasn’t an accident? I did it on purpose. That’s not accidental damage.”
Me: “…”
Customer: “Hmmmmmmm?”
Me: “Have a good day, ma’am.”
This story is part of the Customers-Are-Their-Own-Worst-Enemy roundup!
Question of the Week
What is the most stupid reason a customer has asked to see your manager?
