Maybe If You Watch It At 88 MPH

(I’m on the phone with an irate customer who feels like she has been cheated by my company after purchasing a PVR (aka a DVR, or digital video recorder). Apparently, she misunderstood the previous rep who sold it to her. We have been arguing for quite some time.)

Customer: “I can’t get my money back? Why not? I was told that this PVR unit would let me watch shows that normally come on at 9 PM whenever I wanted.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we can’t refund the item as it is past thirty days since you purchased it. Furthermore, there is no technology available that functions as you describe.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! What’s the point of buying this PVR if I can’t watch shows earlier?”

Me: “Ma’am, the unit is called a PVR. It’s a personal video recorder, and it allows you to record programs to watch at a later time. It is not a time machine.”

Customer: *click*