Martini With A (Plot) Twist

I worked as a bartender for many years. When you’re working at an established place in Manhattan, you don’t have to put up with any customer bull s***, and you also learn very quickly when said bull s*** is about to happen. We are given carte blanche by the managers to deal with that s*** quickly and efficiently, as we don’t have time to waste.

Customer: “Dirty martini. On a tab.” *Hands his card over.*

Me: “Gin or vodka?”

Customer: “Vodka, obviously!”

Whatever. I make it for him.

Customer: “Why are there olives in my martini?! Are you an idiot?”

Me: “Listen, pal, we’re four deep and I’m not wasting my time on some bull s***. I cancelled your tab. F*** off.”

I had exactly half a second to enjoy his Surprised Pikachu Face before I moved on to the next customer. I could just tell he was looking to be an a**hole all night long and I just saved us all a night of suffering.