Mama Mulch

(There is a regular at the garden center who is a major hoarder. We always carry customers’ purchases to their cars, and hers is always filled with old, decaying junk and has a disgusting smell.)

Me: “There’s no more room in the back, ma’am. Where would you like these bags of mulch?”

Customer: “Put it in the front seat.”

(I open the car door, and there is an elderly woman in the front seat.)

Customer: “Oh, mom! I forgot you were in here. Well, just put them in her lap.”