Makes You Lose CTRL

(My caller is having an issue with our website that I can’t replicate.)

Me:“Do you know how to create a screen shot and e-mail it to me? If not, I can walk you through it.”

Caller: “I have Windows 8. I could make a screen shot on my old computer, but you can’t make one on Windows 8.”

(As I use Windows 8 myself, I know this isn’t true.)

Me: “Let’s try and see if we can get it. Do you see the button on your keyboard that says ‘print scr’—”

Caller: “Honey, I worked as a tech for 10 years. If you want me to hit the Print Screen button, just say so. There!”

Me: “Actually, ma’am, I just wanted to make sure you knew where it was, but it sounds like you do. It’s actually alt and the print screen button.”

Caller: “Fine, now what?”

(I assume that she really does know a little about computers, considering the offense she took at my previous instructions. Not wanting to upset her, I decide to continue a bit faster.)

Me: “Okay, now you can paste that into an e-mail for me. Just let me know when you’re ready for my e-mail address.”

Caller: “I’m ready.”

(I give her my e-mail address, spelling it out.)

Me: “I’ll have a look at that screen shot as soon as I get your e-mail, and—”

Caller: “Well, it won’t do much good for you to get a blank e-mail, will it?”

Me: “…I’m sorry?”

Caller: “You didn’t tell me what to do with the screen shot!”

Me: “Oh, you can just paste it into the e-mail.”

(I’m about to ask if she knows how to do that ‘on Windows 8’.)

Caller: “Well, I’m hitting CTRL+P, and it’s not working!”

Me: “Try CTRL+V instea—”

Caller: “Never mind! It’s right click, then paste on my computer. I sent it. Let me know when it’s fixed.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, I will.”

(I never did get that e-mail, and had to call her back the next day to repeat the whole process again.)