Magical Enough To Dry Itself?

(I used to work at a well-known non-profit thrift store. My job was to take donations from customers and then sort the donations so they could be priced and sold. We aren’t allowed to take certain items if they are damaged, wet, or gross. It rains a lot in western Washington and on this particular day, it is dumping. Most donors who bring furniture cover it up with a tarp or something. Then, these donors show up.)

Me: “Hey, guys! How’s it going?”

Donor #1: “Pretty good, bud! Just dropping off some furniture. It got a little wet, though.”

(I look at their truck; they have a recliner made out of some kind of fabric, and it’s soaked.)

Me: “Uh, guys? We won’t be able to take this.”

Donor #1: *while unstrapping the chair* “What? Why not?!”

Me: “Dude… it’s soaked. Why didn’t you cover it?”

Donor #2: *standing uncomfortably close to me* “Hey, man, you’re taking this chair. It’s a great chair; magical even. You see that chair? I bet you’d love that chair, so you’re gonna take it.”

Me: *getting frustrated* “No, I’m not gonna take it; it’s soaked.”

Donor #1: “Well, what the f*** am I supposed to do with it, then?! I came all the way from [Next Town Over, about 20 minutes away]?”

Me: “I suggest the dump, to be honest.”

Donor #1: “Thanks for nothing a**hole. I’ll be back for you. I know where you work!”

Me: *as they are getting in their truck, calling me every profanity they can think of* “Have a good day!”

Donor #1: “F*** off!”

(I never saw them again, and we still got attempts to donate soaking wet furniture all day, along with the pissed-off people to go with them.)