Love At First Foresight

| Working | December 18, 2013

(I’m meeting a girl at a local café. We both have mutual friends and I was coerced into messaging her for a date. She was running a little late, so I was very fidgety in my chair. One of the baristas notices and walks to my table. She is older and very tiny.)

Barista: “Let me guess. You have a date?”

Me: “Yeah. She’s late. I hope.”

Barista: “You hope? Of course she’s coming if there’s a handsome man waiting!”

Me: “That’s very nice of you! I’m just nervous because… she’s honestly the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. And not to sound pitiful, but I honestly can’t believe she wants to meet me in person.”

Barista: “Now, you better listen to me. My husband rattled off the same s*** you said: that I was too beautiful, he didn’t know why I chose him, yadda yadda. But you know what? I chose to get to know him because he had all the qualities that made me feel loved. And I wanted to make him feel loved in return. So if what she knows about you so far has lead her to think you might be capable of all that, then that’s an honor, kid. You’ll be fine.”

(My date walks in. The evening goes incredibly well. Five years later, she and I are engaged. We decide to go to the cafe where we first had a date to celebrate. We walk in and see the same barista, although we doubt she’ll recognize us.)

Barista: “Hello, and what can I get y— OH, MY GOODNESS! YOU TWO! Oh, my goodness. Is that a RING?!”

(My fiancée laughs hysterically. The barista affectionately punches my arm.)

Barista: “I told you so, kiddo!”

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