Bored To The Finich, Cause He Hates His Spinach

(I am 24 years old and am babysitting my six-year-old cousin. She has finished her dinner, with the exception of a large pile of spinach which she hasn’t touched.)

Cousin: “I’m done.”

Me: “You didn’t eat your spinach.”

Cousin: “Can I have some ice cream?”

Me: “Not until you eat your spinach.”

Cousin: “But I’m still hungry.”

Me: “Then eat your spinach.”

Cousin: “I don’t want to.”

Me: “Your mom said you had to eat it.”

Cousin: “My mom isn’t here.”

Me: “If you don’t eat your spinach, I’ll tell her and you will get in trouble.”

Cousin: “I don’t care; it’s gross!”

(This goes on for about 15 minutes, at which point I remember a trick my father used to use to make me eat spinach.)

Me: *sings the Popeye theme song*

Cousin: “What?”

Me: “If you eat spinach, you might become super strong like Popeye.”

Cousin: “What’s Popeye?”

(At that point I decided not to make her eat the spinach because I was more upset that she had never heard of Popeye. I spent the next three hours giving her an extensive lecture on Popeye, which covered things like the characters, the story, and the history of the franchise. I threw out the spinach and didn’t tell my aunt what happened because, judging by the extremely bored expression on my cousin’s face, my Popeye lesson was punishment enough. That was also the first time I ever felt old.)