Loose Change And Looser Hiring Standards

(I’m withdrawing a specific amount of money from my account to pay my child-minding bill.)

Me: “I’d like to withdraw £506.60, please.”

Teller: “Sure, £506.06; no problem.”

Me: “No, that’s £506.60. Sixty pence, not six. And can you put it in this envelope for me please?”

Teller: “That’s fine.”

(He counts out the money. All is fine until we get to the loose change.)

Teller: “…and six pence!”

Me: “No, sorry, that’s not right, it should be sixty pence. Don’t worry about it; I have change. Just don’t seal the envelope please, so that I can put the correct change in.”

Teller: “Oh, sorry, yeah… no problem.”

(The teller puts the money in the envelope and begins to fold over the flap to seal it.)

Me: “Don’t seal the envelope, please. I need the correct amount in there.”

Teller: *continues to fold and brings the envelope to his lips*

Me: “Please, DON’T seal the envelope!”

Teller: *licks and seals the envelope*

Teller: “There you go!”

Me: “Thanks…”

(There’s an awkward silence while I wait for him to complete the transaction.)

Teller: “Have a good day?”

Me: “Can, I have my card back please?”

Teller: “Oh.”

(I unseal the envelope and put 54 pence back in. Funnily enough, the same teller berated a new colleague for making mistakes the last time I was in there.)