Looks Like Their Brains Started Vacation Early

I work in a hotel, and twice today I’ve had to deal with people who apparently booked their rooms whilst wearing blindfolds.

Guest #1: “Hi, I just reserved a room for the weekend, but I didn’t see what the total is. Can you tell me?”

Me: “Maybe. What’s your last name?”

She tells me.

Me: “That’s [Guest #1] with the smoking room with a double bed?”

Guest #1: “Oh, I didn’t want a smoking room.”

Me: “No problem. I can change that.”

Guest #1: “Thanks. What’s my total?”

Me: “It looks like you prepaid for your room, so it doesn’t actually give me that information. It should be in your confirmation email.”

Guest #1: “How do you not know how much I paid for my room?”

How do I not know? How do YOU not know? It’s your money!

Me: “It should be in your confirmation email.”

Guest #1: “I didn’t get one.”

Me: “Well, if you contact the company you booked through, they should be able to give you your total.”

Guest #1: “I don’t know who I booked through.”

Eventually, she figured out who she booked through. Then, started asking me about a local golf course and said she’d booked us because of our proximity to it. She asked specifically how far away we were from it. I wasn’t familiar with it, so I looked it up and told her it was a little over twenty minutes away. Then she just started to say, “Cancel, cancel, cancel,” like I was an automated phone system.

Sometime later, another guest came in.

Guest #2: “Hi. I need to cancel my reservation.”

Me: “All right, looks like you booked through a third party, so you’ll need to contact them for the cancellation.”

Guest #2: “Who did I book through?”

Me: “Uh, looks like [Redacted].”

Guest #2: “Yoda?”

Me: “No, [Redacted].”

Guest #2: “Doga?”

Me: “No, ma’am, [R-E-D-A-C-T-E-D].”

Guest #2: “…Goda?”