Looking For A Book (En)Title(Ment)
I take a customer call when we open, around 9 AM.
Caller: “Your store is closed, and you need to come and open it!”
Me: “Ma’am, the store is open.”
Caller: “I’m standing outside right now, and it’s closed with the lights off!”
Me: “Where is the store?”
Caller: “[College Campus]!”
Me: “West Virginia? You’re calling a store in Maryland.”
Caller: “Well, they weren’t picking up, so I called the first number I could find on Google!”
Me: “That branch is a college store, and they’re closed because it’s spring break.”
Caller: “So you’re gonna come over here and open the store for me!”
She said it as a demand, not a question.
Me: “No, ma’am. That store will reopen when the college does.”
Caller: “But I need a book now! You need to come and open the store!”
Me: “I’m a four-hour drive away.”
Caller: “Fine, I can wait until after lunch.”
Me: “Ma’am… I feel you’re misunderstanding why I’m telling you how far away I am. I will not be driving four hours to help you get a book, only to drive four hours back. There are other bookstores in your town. Go to one of those.”
Caller: “They’re all the way across town!”
Me: “And you’re asking me to drive across two states.”
Caller: “Ugh, you lazy b****!” *Click.*
