Lollipop Flop

, , , , , | Right | January 30, 2020

(A customer has just brought her son’s three piggy banks into our branch to be counted in our coin machine. Unfortunately, all three piggy banks are so stuffed with change that it’s a challenge to get the coins out. My boss notices me fighting with the first one and comes over with a letter opener and a pen.)

Boss: “Try this.” *hands me the letter opener* “I’ll use the pen. We’ll get this done!”

Me: “Okay, this works so much better!”

(A game token flies out of the first piggy bank. I manage to grab it before it goes into the machine.)

Me: “Seriously? [Boss], look at this.”

Boss: “Yeah, that’s typical. We’ll definitely find more of those.”

(Ten minutes later, we’ve successfully emptied all three banks. We’ve also found several game tokens, an earring, and multiple gum and candy wrappers.)

Me: *to the customer* “Okay, that came out to $100. How would you like this back?”

Customer: “Twenties are fine, thanks.”

Little Boy: “It’s my BIRTHDAY!”

Me: “Would you like a lollipop?”

Little Boy: “Yes!”

(I hand him a lollypop. He struggles with the wrapper before handing it to his mom.)

Little Boy: “I can’t open it!”

Customer: “I’ll open it when we get in the car, okay?”

Little Boy: “No, I want HER—” *points at me* “—to open it!”

(The customer shrugs and hands it to me. When I touch it, I realize that the little boy has put the whole wrapper in his mouth. It is now sticky and wet. I somehow manage to open and hand it back to the little boy.)

Me: “Okay, there you go. Have a great day!”

Customer: “Thank you!” *walks out*

(I douse my hands with hand sanitizer and turn around to see my boss laughing.)

Me: “Can I—”

Boss: *still laughing* “Yes, you can go to lunch.”

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