Literal Highway Robbery

, , , , , | Working | April 28, 2020

(I’ve woken up and realized I can’t find my wallet. As I don’t have my wallet and thus don’t have any cash for the bus, I end up walking over six miles down the road to get to the bar I visited last night to see if I left it there. I see that there is some sort of street festival on the road and walk past an entryway to get to the bar, which is now only about twenty feet away. Suddenly, a cop barrels up to me, shouting.)

Cop: “It’s a $10 entry fee to access this street! You can’t come in without paying!”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize there was a festival today. I’m literally just here to get to the bar that’s right there. I think I left my wallet there last night.”

Cop: “It’s $10 to access this street!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but like I said, I think I left my wallet at the bar. I’m just trying to get in to see if they have it and then I’m leaving.”

Cop: “Nobody can get on this street without paying $10!”

Me: *pause* “What if they work on this street?”

Cop: “Then they have to pay $10!”

Me: “I don’t see how that’s right at all. But I literally don’t have any money and I just walked over six miles to get here. Is there any way I can just go to the bar and see if they have my wallet? I can give you the $10 if they have it, and I’m not even going to stay for the festival.”

Cop: “Not without paying $10! Why don’t you just go to an ATM and get $10?”

Me: “First, I don’t have my wallet, so I can’t use an ATM. Also, my bank is on this street, so I can’t even go to the bank to get it. You’ve kind of put me into a corner here.”

Cop: “Well, you’re not getting in until you pay the $10 entry fee to access this street!”

(I then had to spend a half-hour begging random people for money for the privilege of accessing a street before I finally had enough to get in. And, of course, the bar didn’t have my wallet, so I ended up having to beg for money and walk well over ten miles for no reason. I have no clue how it’s right in the slightest to bar anyone from using a public street without paying, especially if they work on the street or have business unrelated to the festival. But maybe that’s just me.)

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