Like A Robber In A Donut Shop

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(This is early December, when most of the companies have their big night out. A visibly drunk patron needs to be asked to leave due to inebriation.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I think you’ve had enough for tonight, and I think it’s best if you call it a night.”

Customer: “What? I’m not druuunk! You’re ouuut of yoooour mind!”

(I guide the drunk customer to the door, which he immediately grabs a hold of to resist being led out of the bar.)

Customer: “I’m not leaving! You’re going to have to call the cops to get me out of here!”

Me: “Well, sir, if you take a look over at the table with the people looking very intently at us… that’s the police department’s Christmas party.”

Customer: *leaves, rather expediently*

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