Like A Fish Out Of Water

CONTENT WARNING: Animal Abuse

(Our store has a return policy involving fish: they can return them as long as they have the animal and receipt.)

Customer: “My fish died again.”

Me: “How long did you have the fish for?”

Customer: “Only about two days. This is the second fish this has happened with.”

(I proceed to start asking questions about her daily tasks of tank operations. After several minutes, I can’t figure out what is wrong.)

Me: “How about you take me through your daily routine?”

Customer: “Well, first I go down and feed the fish. Then I pick him up and pet him for a bit. Then around lunchtime, I pet him some more.”

Me: “So you pull the fish out of the water and pet it?”

Customer: “Only for a few minutes. Why?”

Me: “Fish can’t breathe out of water. Didn’t you notice it gasping?”

Customer: “Well, it can just hold its breath, right?”

This story is part of the Terrible Fish Owners roundup!

Read the next Terrible Fish Owners roundup story!

Read the Terrible Fish Owners roundup!