Let’s Hope She Doesn’t Inherit Her Brains, Either

I work reception at a medical office that specializes in reconstructive surgery, but the doctor’s skills sometimes overlap with private patients looking for plastic surgery. A woman comes in looking a little concerned.

Me: “Can I help you, ma’am?”

Client: “Yes, I need to schedule a nose job.”

Me: “I can schedule a consultation with one of our doctors for you, ma’am. However, since our clinic specializes in reconstructive surgery referrals from hospitals in the area, elective procedures do have a waitlist.”

Client: “How long?”

Me: “Currently four months.”

Client: “What?! I can’t wait that long!”

Me: “Can I ask what the urgency is for, ma’am?”

Client: “I’m pregnant! I need to get a new nose before the baby is born!”

Me: “Ma’am, we don’t offer any elective procedures to patients who are pregnant.”

Client: “But you don’t understand! I need to give myself a new nose before the baby comes! I don’t want her to inherit this nose!”