Things Are Lining Up Nicely

, , , | Learning | October 10, 2017

(The middle school where I teach likes to ease into things at the beginning of the year, so we don’t get our class lists until the Friday of the first week of school. The days leading up to that day are full of fun activities for students. Usually that means they are quite crazy and chatty, which I fully expect for the first few days, especially since my grade seven class last year was super chatty and had trouble with lining up in the hall. I get my group and we have an activity in the art room first thing.)

Me: “I need a volunteer.”

(A student volunteers.)

Me: “Okay, [Student] is our line leader. He’s going to stand outside, everyone is going to line up single-file behind him, and we’re going to go to art.”

(As my students leave, I grab my supplies and get out there as quickly as I can to meet the students. I’m expecting some chaos, but I emerge outside to all my students lined up perfectly and silently, waiting for me.)

Me: “…”

Students: *waiting patiently*

Me: “What the… all right.”

(They continue this kind of behaviour all day, which is amazing, but throws me off a bit. Later on, one of my older students, who is at the high school, comes to visit and I relay that story to them.)

High-School Student: “The grade tens don’t even do that!”

(So, great job, students I had that day. Sorry if I appeared confused; your awesomeness astounded me!)

When Science Socks It To You!

, , , , | Learning | October 10, 2017

(The class is entering their science period.)

Teacher: *bursting through the doors* “EVERYBODY OUT! I’VE BURNT A SOCK IN THE MICROWAVE!”

Entire Class: “What?”

Teacher: *waving us out* “Go, go!”

(A noticeable stench is wafting out of the classroom. The entire class follows the teacher.)

Me: *whispering to my friends* “How did she burn a sock in the microwave?”

(We ended up staying in the garden for the next hour or so. Ever since, that room has always smelled a little bit like burnt burritos.)

An Electronic Alarm

, , , , | Learning | October 10, 2017

(One of our classmates stupidly answers his phone in class. The sub tries to take it from him and is forced to call security, as per protocol, when he refuses to hand it over. He then refuses to hand it to security, instead trying to pick a fight and play the tough guy act in an attempt at intimidating the guard. The school has a policy where if someone refuses to hand over something, they search everyone in the room, regardless if they were involved or just bystanders, and take away all found electronics. The believed intent is to punish the student making trouble by punishing everyone and making them all hate said student, which is horrible on several accounts. The guard takes the student, and we’re left with the horrified-looking sub who was apparently unaware of this policy.)

Substitute Teacher: “Wait… So, if one student misbehaves they punish everyone?”

Classmate #1: “I got searched three times this year alone because a classmate refused to hand over something. My iPod was taken and they won’t let me have it back until the end of the school year, and now I’m going to lose my brother’s Nintendo DS that he lent me since I have a long ride home today.”

Me: “I have my mom’s cellphone in my bag right now for emergencies!”

(Note: Mine was stolen from my locker a week previously, so my mom lent me hers until mine could be replaced, and told me not to put it in my locker.)

Me: “If they take it, she can’t get it back until June!”

Substitute Teacher: “But that’s not fair at all! None of you have even done anything wrong!”

Classmate #2: “That’s how they do things. They also have a policy where if someone breaks into your locker and takes your cellphone, like they did to [My Name], it’s your fault for having a phone on school property, regardless if it was turned off and out of sight. They won’t do anything about it, but a teacher left her cellphone on a bathroom sink and it was stolen, so they gave everyone on the floor a pat down until they found it, and then suspended the girl for stealing a teacher’s property.”

Substitute Teacher: “How long do you think until they get back here to search you guys?”

Classmate #3: “They could be here any minute, actually.”

(She then puts on a serious face and reaches under the desk, retrieving a handbag large enough to impress Mary Poppins, and opens it on the desk.)

Substitute Teacher: “Everyone, quick! Get out your electronics and hide them all in here before security gets back!”

(There was a huge rush to the front of the room as everyone dropped our stuff inside and then quickly sat back down. Security showed up less than a minute later, and seemed surprised to only find a single broken iPod that a classmate didn’t feel was worth protecting. Unfortunately, despite the glowing reviews and praises we all gave our teacher about the sub the next day, we never saw her as a sub in the school again. We think she might have refused to work here again after learning how they treat us.)

Lacking Some Decent Spidey Senses

, , , , , | Learning | October 9, 2017

(The student in the story is not the brightest. We have a prompt to rewrite the ending of a story that we read.)

Teacher: “Your alternate ending has to actually make sense. You couldn’t say that [Character] gets bitten by a radioactive spider, gets powers, and breaks down the wall to escape.”

Student: “How do you come up with this stuff?!”

A Story With A Happy Ending

, , , , | Learning | October 9, 2017

(I am in fifth grade, and I’ve always loved writing fiction stories. My teacher presents us with two projects: First, we have to write a realistic fiction story for language arts, and second, we have to give a report on the Holocaust for social studies. I go up to the teacher and ask if I can write a story for the social studies project, rather than do a report, and she says yes. I am ecstatic, as a report sounds like a lot of boring, pointless work. About a month later, we turn in both projects. The following occurs as I hand in my Holocaust story:)

Teacher: “[My Name], this isn’t the report I asked for. You didn’t do the work?”

Me: “Um… you said I could write a story instead of the report.”

Teacher: “No, I never said that. When did that happen?”

Me: “Th-the day you told us about the project, I asked if I could write a story instead, and you said yes.”

Teacher: “No, I said you could write a story about the Holocaust for your realistic fiction story. You still had to do the report.”

Me: “Oh.”

(I am feeling extremely nervous, as I am very shy, and I am terrified I am going to fail the project.)

Teacher: “All right, just sit down for now.”

(The rest of class seems to go by smoothly, allowing me to forget the incident ever occurred, until…)

Teacher: “[My Name], come up here for a second.”

(I go up to her desk.)

Teacher: “I read through the story. Are you sure you wrote it?”

Me: “Yes?”

Teacher: “This work doesn’t look like a fifth-grader’s writing. Are you sure you didn’t copy it from somewhere?”

Me: “No! I wrote all of it. I didn’t copy or anything.”

Teacher: “Okay, because if you did, that’s plagiarism. You can get in huge trouble for that.”

Me: “I know. I didn’t copy anything.”

Teacher: “Well…” *she flips through it a bit* “This is really amazing writing. I know you weren’t supposed to write a story, but I’ll accept it this time. Just know you have to be more careful next year in middle school, since the teachers there won’t do something like this, understand?”

Me: “Okay.”

(I managed not to fail the project, but had to write an essay with the other kids who didn’t do the report about why I didn’t do it and such. I found it completely pointless and never actually turned it in. The kicker? The next year, in sixth grade, I turned in a short story instead of a science report and received an A for creativity.)

Page 5/1,185First...34567...Last
« Previous
Next »