(A seven-year-old student and I are talking.)

Me: “So, when you get home, what are you going to do?”

Student: “Play games with my brother.”

Me: “Oh. What’s your brother’s name?”

Student: “I don’t know. I’ll ask him tonight.”

(I am meeting with my adviser the day after I pulled an all-nighter to finish a project.)

Adviser: “So, your grades seem good. Are you taking care of yourself? Eating and sleeping properly?”

Me: *tiredly* “As much as I can, yeah.”

Adviser: “It’s very important to get enough sleep at night. You might not think sleep deprivation affects you, but it can really hurt your grades and even your health…”

(I’m not sure how long she talked about sleep deprivation. I fell asleep.)

(I am in a freshman biology class in a very conservative school. We are studying reproduction and are watching a video on pregnancy that follows three different couples throughout pregnancy.)

Teacher: “Now I know most of you are squeamish about childbirth, but don’t worry. There is no nudity though it will show diagrams of reproductive systems.

(The movie proceeds as expected until we get to the very end and we are at the part where the last lady is in the hospital giving birth. The movie is showing lots of diagrams, the lady’s face, the husband, and the doctors. All of the sudden, the camera switches to the baby crowning.)

Whole Class: “UGH!” *everyone either turns away or covers their eyes*

Teacher: *rushing over to cover the screen* “I am so sorry! I forgot about that part!”

(She covers the screen for a minute.)

Teacher: “Okay. I rhink that part is over.”

(Almost the second she drops her hands the camera goes back to the baby coming out.)

Whole Class: “Ahhh!” *cover their eyes and look away*

Teacher: “You know what? I think we are done with this for today.”

(Our teacher is explaining to us the digestive system.)

Teacher: “So, the small intestine is around seven meters long.”

Student: “No way! Really?”

Teacher: “Indeed, [Student].”

Student: “But there is no way a seven-meter-long thing fits in me!”

(The entire class starts laughing out loud, and then she realizes what she said.)

(In science class, the teacher is explaining that humanity hasn’t invented anything that can go at light-speed.)

Kid: “I know what we invented that can go as fast as light!”

Teacher: “And that would be…”

Kid: “A light bulb!”

(He’s dead serious. Most of the class just nods along with him.)