(My biology teacher has just assigned a make-work sheet to fill out. It’s a file on Google Drive, and we get laptops and class time to complete it.)

Me: “You know, I’ve found every single assignment from [Teacher] on the first hit on Google.”

Lab Partner: “You should try it. This is just to take up some class time anyway.”

(I type a basic description of the assignment in to Google.)

Lab Partner: “Ha! It’s the second hit, not the first!”

Me: “Shut up. I was close.”

(I click it.)

Me: “Oh, hey. Look what’s at the bottom of the page.”

Lab Partner: “An answer key?”

Me: “An answer key.”

(We print out the key. Shortly after, a student goes up to the teacher. The teacher then calls to the class.)

Teacher: “So it may have come to your attention that I didn’t remove the answer key from the bottom of the worksheet I shared with you…”

(I look back at the worksheet on Google Drive. Sure enough, if you scroll down, the answer key is right there.)

Lab Partner: “So he not only stole an assignment online from some college professor in Wisconsin, he was too lazy to take the answers off the end?”

(I am given the job of taking messages to students all over the school, telling them to see various teachers or return books. The highlight of my day is this:)

Me: *enters a classroom of 15-year-olds* “Hey, I’ve got a message for [Name #1] and [Name #2]?”

Student: “Yeah?”

Me: *reading the message* “Okay. You need to return your Twilight books by Tuesday.”

(The entire class burst out laughing as I quickly left the room.)

(My AP European history teacher has just come back from a trip to Europe, and she’s telling the class a story from her travels in the Netherlands. She gets to where the story takes place and stops herself.)

Teacher: “No, it’s not appropriate for people your age.”

Class: “What?! What was it? Where were you?!”

Teacher: “Okay… well… it was a place for older people to… socialize with each other… and… relax…”

Class: “Was it a brothel? A hookah bar? BROTHEL?  Were you in a brothel?!”

Teacher: “NO, NO, NO, NO!”” *waves hands frantically*

(The class is now more convinced than ever that it was a brothel.)

Class: “It’s okay. You can tell us. We read [detailed section about medieval sex] in [history book].”

Teacher: “FINE. It was… a pub.”

Class: “A PUB?! You couldn’t tell us it was a pub?!”

(We were so disappointed.)

(I’m a quick learner, and finish tests early. To keep people from making comments, I often wait to turn it in. To keep myself from getting bored, I make little drawings on the paper. Later in the year, I announce that I’m leaving. I make little notes on the last test.)

Me: “Do you even really notice these?”

Teacher: *in writing* “I do. I copy them all.”

(I’m a rather quiet person, but also a big prankster, which works to my advantage since it’s hard for people to tell when I’m joking. For one of our science tests we have to identify various compounds by looking at them through a microscope. Since it’s an unusual type of test, we’re allowed to confer with other students to make our identifications, and I decide to pull a prank by telling everyone that the sugar is actually salt.)

Classmate #1: “You’re sure it’s salt?”

Me: “Yeah, I’ve seen pictures of it under a microscope before.”

Classmate #2: “It looks like sugar to me…”

Me: “Trust me, it’s salt. I’m totally sure.”

Classmate #2: “Okay…”

(Eventually I overhear everyone identifying the sugar as salt. Skip ahead to the next week, after the test has been graded and we’re going over the answers…)

Teacher: “And number 21… was sugar. [My Name], you were the only one to get this one right.”

Me: *innocently* “Really?”

Classmate #2: “You said it was salt!”

Me: “You believed me!”

Classmate #2: “I could’ve gotten an A, no thanks to you!”

Teacher: “Hey, settle down. [My Name] has a point. In science, you don’t just take someone’s word for something. You test it and examine it for yourself.”

Me: “Cool! I was just playing a joke, but it ended up actually meaning something.”

Teacher: “Just don’t do it again.”