Defiance Is The Best Teacher

| Vancouver, Canada | Learning | March 11, 2013

(My friend, a former coworker, comes in on a Saturday to say hello. She is standing by the counter chatting with me when a regular customer comes in. I immediately go to serve her.)

Customer: “I’ll have a latte.” *looks at my friend* “You’re wearing that to work?!”

(My friend is wearing ripped jeans, a local band shirt, and boots you could kick through a wall with, as well as her nose stud and four rings in each ear.)

My Friend: “I don’t work here any more.”

Customer: “Well, no wonder if you started showing up like a hooligan! Young people have no sense of professionalism these days! If I met you in the street, I’d think you were going to mug me!”

My Friend: “Actually, I quit because I started a new job.”

Customer: “Doing what, exactly? Scaring children?”

My Friend: “Sort of. I’m a kindergarten teacher.”

Customer: *gasps, grabs her latte, and runs out the door*

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You Just Got Schooled, Part 3

| AZ, USA | Learning | March 11, 2013

(I worked in the tech repair department of computer electronics retailer. I walk up to the customer service desk to do an inspections for a coworker and a customer making a return.)

Coworker: *to me* “Hey, this customer is doing a return and we need the product inspected.”

Me: “Okay.”

(I inspect it and passively listen as the customer and coworker reminisce about the days when he was her soccer coach in a public high school a couple years back.)

Customer: “…yeah, things on the team aren’t like they used to be. With that recent rule change, they’re letting homeschoolers join our sports teams now too. The nerve of them taking positions from kids who are enrolled at the school and actually learning something! Those parents are uneducated idiots to prevent their kids from getting a good education.”

Coworker: “Wow, sounds like there are some issues to be worked out.” *looks at me* “Hey, weren’t you homeschooled?”

Me: “Yes I was, for six years into high school. My mother has a Bachelors in Teaching and father has a Bachelors in Science. I received four tech certifications before working here, and just graduated with a bachelor in Computer Information Systems.”

Customer: *stands their quietly, looking away*

Me: *to the customer* “Everything looks good. You can go ahead with the return.”

 

You Just Got Schooled, Part 2

| PA, USA | Learning | March 11, 2013

(I’ve just moved to a small town, where the job market is even worse than most places. I’ve taken a job waiting tables at a small diner. I’m waiting on an older man and his wife when the following exchange takes place.)

Customer: “So, why didn’t you go to college?”

Me: “Um, I did.”

Customer: “Oh, didn’t make it?”

Me: “No. I graduated five years ago.”

Customer: “Well, I meant a real school… not like [local community college].”

Me: “Actually, I went to [Ivy League school].”

Customer’s Wife: “Oh, that’s a good school, dear!”

Customer: “So, what are you doing here?”

Customer’s Wife: “She’s trying to take your order. So stop being a jack*** and tell the nice girl what you’d like already!”

 

Losing English Patience

| OH, USA | Learning | March 11, 2013

(I work at a sandwich shop across the street from a high school. I serve a lot of teachers who come over here for lunch.)

Me: “You want a turkey on white with tomato? That’s [price].”

Customer #1: “Oh, and can I have a bottle of water?”

Me: “‘Course!”

Customer #1: *scoffs* “I can’t believe you just said that. As an English teacher, I think I should tell you that saying that isn’t proper English.”

Me: *not sure what to say* “Um… sorry?”

Customer #1: “There you go again! Those are fragments, not complete sentences! All the other teachers who come in here would be ashamed.”

(The customer behind her speaks up.)

Customer #2: “Yeah, well, I’m a math teacher, and trust me, we don’t care.”

Music Is Ageless

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Learning | March 11, 2013

(I am a 21-year-old receptionist at a music school. One evening, there is a student waiting for his lesson in the reception area.)

Me: “Hi there. How old are you?”

Student: “8 years old. How old are you?”

Me: *smiles* “How old do you think I am?”

Student: “I dunno. You look really old.”

*silence*

Student: “Yeah, you look like you’re like, 17 or something.”

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