(Our English teacher has come to class with his six-year-old son, since his school suddenly took a snow day but our college has not.)
Teacher: *to his son* “There, take some papers and pens to pass time.”
(It’s been an hour and the kid is drawing or listening peacefully. He then stands up and go beside his father.)
Son: “Dad?”
Teacher: “Yes? Is it something you don’t understand?”
Son: “No. But what you say is really boring!”
(He goes back to sit and resume drawing, while everyone in the class is laughing.)
Classmate: “The truth comes from kids’ mouths!”
Related:
From The Mouth Of Babes, Part 9
From The Mouth Of Babes, Part 8
From The Mouth Of Babes, Part 7
From The Mouth Of Babes, Part 6
From The Mouth Of Babes, Part 5
(I’m in beginning band and I play bassoon, so we practice with the saxophones. Saxophones keep screwing up a note involving the middle finger.)
Teacher: “Saxophones! Use your naughty finger!” *he starts to wave his middle finger around* “SEE THIS?! USE YOUR MIDDLE FINGER!”
Students: *burst out laughing*
(I am attending the first class of a programming class and my teacher has just told us we could program our assignments in groups.)
Other Student: “Does this mean that the workload will be too much for one student?”
Teacher: “No. It is not the workload for you. It is the workload for me.”
(I’m a graduate student mentor helping my undergraduate students prepare research proposals. One of my students outlined their paper starting with stating her results up front, then by discussing the lit review. I’m trying to explain why it is a bad idea.)
Me: “The reader will already know what your results were without you roping them in to your study.”
Student: “So? I’m letting them know what the relationship is before they look at the research so they understand where it fits in.”
Me: “You’re going to see what they won’t read after the results. You give it away up front and there’s no incentive to finish.”
Student: “I don’t follow.”
Me: “It’s like watching How I Met Your Mother. You know it ends with him meeting the mother, so why bother watching?”
Student: “… That makes perfect sense.”
(It’s the second day of class.)
Professor: “Okay, guys. I know some of you have hippie parents and I will call you by whatever name you prefer, but today, perhaps whoever signed in as ‘Harvey the Wonder Hamster’ yesterday might consider using his or her actual name.”
