The Twelve Months Of Christmas

(I work at a well-known craft chain. Because of the nature of our merchandise, we get seasonal stuff pretty early so that people who want to do handmade gifts and decorations can get started early. So it’s September, but not only do we have all our Halloween stuff, we have a good portion of our Christmas stuff. And it’s all covered in glitter.)

Manager: *over the headset* “I’m sick of Christmas already and it’s only September.”

Me: “It’s only going to get worse from here. Merry Christmas!”

Manager: “Noooooo!”

Coworker: *singing over the headset* “Feliz navidad! Feliz navidad!”

Me: You’re fired, [Coworker]. You’re feliz navi-dead.