Lake Tah-No

(I work front desk at a hotel that sits directly across the street from Lake Tahoe. A guest comes to the desk, very upset.)

Guest: “I’m very angry about my room, and I want a discount right now!”

Me: “Okay, what is the problem with the room? Maybe I can get it fixed for you.”

Guest: “I paid over $200 a night for a lake-view room, and I can’t see the lake right now!”

Me: “It is ten o’clock at night, ma’am. When it’s dark outside, I’m afraid that the lake isn’t visible from your room.”

Guest: “How can that be? I paid a lot of f****** money for this room because of the lake view. I should be able to see the lake 24 hours a day for that price.”

Me: “I’m very sorry, ma’am, but there is nothing I can do. I assure you that you will be able to see the lake in the morning.”

Guest: “Why don’t you just turn the light switch on for the lake? I know you have a switch where you can turn the lights on in the lake and I would be able to see it.”

Me: “I don’t have such a switch; there are no lights in the lake.”

Guest: “Don’t lie to me; I know you can light it up!”

Me: “I’m very sorry, ma’am. You’ll have to wait until morning.”

Guest: “I’m going to have you fired for this. I’m calling your manager first thing in the morning!”

(My boss just laughed at her and I still have my job.)