Laid It Out For Her

| Friendly | February 6, 2015

(I’ve just reunited with my long-distance boyfriend for the first time in nine months, and am bearing the evidence in the form of love bites all over my neck. I’m in line at the grocery store, with a middle-aged and an elderly woman behind me. The middle-aged woman is muttering to the elderly woman.)

Middle-Aged Woman: *barely loud enough for me to hear* “It’s just disgraceful!”

Elderly Woman: *loudly* “Oh, shut the f*** up and stop hating on her just because she’s getting laid and you’re not!”

(I gave the elderly woman a thumbs-up over my shoulder. She cackled and the middle-aged woman turned red and didn’t say a word until I got out of line.)


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