Knock It Off
I work at a well-known, kinda pricey clothing brand (not super expensive like Prada, but still up there in terms of individual item cost).
A woman comes in and presents to me a knockoff of one of our items. A really, really bad one.
Me: “Yes?”
Woman: “This broke. I want a replacement.”
When this happens, we’re not allowed to outright say to the customer that they have a fake knockoff, so we just state:
Me: “This is not one of our products.”
Woman: “Yeah, I know, I got this at a flea market from some Chinese lady for like, fifty bucks.”
Me: *Surprised she just came out and said it.* “So… you understand why I cannot replace this.”
Woman: “Yeah, but your brand doesn’t want people out there thinking that they’re bad quality, so you should take this one off the street, and put a real one out there, with me, to make your brand look better.”
Me: “Ma’am, I don’t think there’s a way for you to make our brand look better.”
Woman: “That’s how you talk to customers?”
Me: “No, because customers buy something.”
She walked out with her flea market knockoff. I don’t think she was in danger of damaging the brand with it.
