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Keep Your Eyes Peeled For These Jerks

, , , | Right | CREDIT: Mastervodo | July 15, 2021

I arrive at the hotel where I work and check for authorizations/balances on rooms as per usual. One of our rooms, 305, shows “not authorized” for tonight. Room 305 is already on my red flag radar from a couple of nights ago. Noise complaint at 1:30 am. Local. Young. Never wear masks. Inwardly groaned when they extended their stay the first time.

I do the usual procedure. It’s late — 11:15 — so I print up a declined credit card letter, make a lockout key, and lock out the room. They’ve been up all night every night the last several days, so I don’t expect them to be in the room anyway.

Not ten minutes later, I hear a car peeling out in the parking lot, music blaring. They do two laps around the lot, screeching their tires every chance. We aren’t a very large hotel, so the parking lot is right in front of half of the rooms. I go out to confront whatever moron is doing that and waking up everyone on that side of the hotel.

I see the car park at the very end of the lot at the opposite end of the hotel. Yep. 305. Because of course, it is.

I get to them and chew them out for waking up half of my hotel at 11:30 pm.

Driver: “I’m sorry. That was a stupid thing to do.”

It was, but that’s not why he’s apologizing; it’s because he got caught and called out on it. The girlfriend, who also happens to be the one to whom the room is registered, is in the passenger seat. I address her.

Me: “I just got done putting a declined letter under your door because your credit card declined. Because of all this, it’s time for you to go.”

They meekly come to the front desk.

Guest: “There’s money in the account!”

I was having none of it. I grabbed a cart and escorted them to the room. They said they’d be out in five minutes, I told them I would give them ten, and they took thirty, because of course, they did.

The girl had some snide remarks on her way out, which I didn’t respond to. That is unlike me normally, but frankly, I was just happy to be able to evict them without having to call the police to do so.

And of course, they peeled out of the parking lot as they left, which I knew they were going to do.

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