Karma Klubbing

(I am waiting in the queue with a friend. We notice a group of girls pushing from the back of the queue past everyone, whilst loudly proclaiming that they are on the guest list. My friend and I decide to form a wall and stop them getting past us.)

Girl: “Move, we are on the guest list.”

Me: “Guest list closed at 11 pm.”

Girl: “But we have queue jump!”

Me: “No, you don’t.”

(I turn around and ignore them until we reach the bouncers at the front. By now the girls are loud and aggressive, my friend has been punched.)

Girl: *to bouncer* “These guys aren’t letting us past! We have guest list!”

Bouncer: “Calm down, you can’t just push in.”

Girl: “We didn’t start pushing; these d***s aren’t letting us past.”

Bouncer: “It’s a queue. Why would they?”

Girl: “Because we f***ing told them we have queue jump!”

Bouncer: “Aw! Why didn’t you tell us that? Come forward.” *cue big smiles from girls* “Now jump your a**es to the back of the queue.”