Karma Karma Karma Karma Karma Cinnamon!

(I have worked at this restaurant since it opened. It is a mom-and-pop-style place, not a chain, and therefore we have some items not commonly seen. A gentleman and his wife come in for dinner and peruse the menu for a while, then call me over.)

Me: “Do you have any questions, or are you all decided?”

Woman: “I’ll have the fish and chips.”

Man: “I’m curious about this pork chop dinner. Apples and blueberries?”

Me: “Yes! It’s actually quite delicious. It is a bone-in chop, 1.5 inches thick, and is stuffed with apples coated in a cinnamon glaze. Once cooked, we top it with a house-made blueberry sauce.”

Man: “Hmm. Sounds interesting, but pretty weird. I’m not sure if I’d spend $30 on it.”

Me: “Well, sir, if you’d like to try it, I’m sure you’ll enjoy it. If you don’t, I’ll comp the dish for you and get you another meal! I’m positive you’ll love it.”

Man: “Can’t say no to that deal! Sure, I’ll take one.”

(The couple eat their food and rave non-stop. They become regulars, and the man has the pork chop once a week for the next four months! I tell my manager about this, and he scoffs.)

Boss: “Yeah, who cares. Don’t be giving food away; that’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”

(Some months later, a woman comes in from out of town for a bite to eat on her road trip. She’s scanning the menu.)

Woman: “I can’t seem to find anything I think I’d like… Can you do the pork chop without the apples and blueberries?”

Me: “Well, our chef prepares the chops fresh every morning once they’re delivered, so, unfortunately, all the chops are stuffed already. I can hold the blueberry sauce, though!”

Woman: “I’m just not sure I’d like that.”

Me: “Well, if you—”

Boss: “Let me tell you a story! When we first opened…”

(He rattles off my entire story about the previously mentioned couple, then finishes with:)

Boss: “—and so I told him I’d pay for his entire bill if he didn’t like it! I do that with all my customers and haven’t ever had to yet. That’s why people love this place so much; my service is always above and beyond. I’ll get your bill for you if you aren’t satisfied.”

(I’m standing there this entire time, absolutely flabbergasted and appalled at what I just heard.)

Woman: “Sure, I’ll have one. With the sauce! Also a glass of [Expensive Top-Shelf Red Wine] with it, and [Top-Shelf Cocktail] for now.”

(Her food arrives and she takes a bite, immediately spitting it out and letting out an, “EEEUGH!”)

Boss: “What’s wrong?”

Woman: “I didn’t know this had cinnamon in it; I hate cinnamon… I’ll just go to [Fast Food Joint] across the road… Blegh!”

(She started to leave, when my boss stopped and asked her to pay for her drinks. She reminded him of what he had said, and looked confused. He had no choice but to let her know it was covered… out of his own pocket! Karma bites!)