Just Let Me Be Angry!

I have been dating my current girlfriend for about a year and a half. I consider myself to be pretty generous and thoughtful, but I’m not really a person who likes to gift flowers. I’ve gifted a few potted plants, but cut flowers? I just don’t like how they slowly die and wilt over the next few days, and then they just leave a mess.

My girlfriend did ask for flowers for Valentine’s Day, which I gave her, and she was happy.

However, at some point later, she is in a bad mood and decides that once is not enough for eighteen months of dating. We don’t live with each other.

I’m going about my day when I get a text from her.

Girlfriend: “We’ve been dating for over a year and you’ve only ever given me flowers once! Once!”

Me: “You’re right; I’m so inconsiderate. All I’ve ever given you is jewelry, fuel for your car, clothes, trips to restaurants, lots of homemade food, vacations to California and New York, and a $1,500 wig.”

Girlfriend: “This was supposed to make you look bad, but it ended up making me look bad!”

Me: “Yep.”