I Just American’t Even

, , , , , | Right | February 15, 2018

(A woman with family in tow comes to our branch of a charity chain to enquire about weekend opening hours. While waiting for someone in the back to get the details, I’m left to watch the shop. It should be noted that, despite being a local, I have next to no accent, leaving many people unsure of my nationality.)

Woman: “I’ve got to ask: Which part of America are you from?”

Me: “Oh, haha, no. I’m not American, at all.”

Woman: “Really? From Canada, then.”

Me: “No, no. I’m from quite nearby.”

Woman: “But you’ve been living in another country, then?”

Me: “Nope, sorry. I was born and bred two miles north of here.”

Woman: “Oh, my. I’m so sorry for your broken accent.”

(I’m about to laugh it off when she turns to her husband with the rest of the family.)

Woman: “Honey! Come hear this young man’s broken accent!”

(Fortunately, a coworker returned with the opening times and I could make my escape.)

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