Jupiter Ascending

(My dad has recently gotten very religious in his old age.)

Me: “Dad, you know what? I read that Jupiter has a storm that can fit three Earths in it!”

Dad: *looking disturbed* “God is great and God is big; if you believe in Him, that’s all you ever need.”

Me: “Wait, what? Why did you start talking about God?”

Dad: “Jupiter is big and God is, too. He made the Heaven and Earth.”

Me: “Did he make Jupiter, too? What about the other planets?”

Dad: *looking really disturbed* “Yes, of course.”

Me: “Why?”

Dad: “Just go read your bible. That’s all you need to know, not outer space facts.”