It’s Totally A Laughing Matter

, , , , , | Right | April 29, 2020

My siblings hate going to the movies with me because they say I cry or laugh way too easily, and they’re right.

After working in fast food, tutoring, and offices on campus, I get my first retail job in an office supply store at the beginning of summer. Before I begin, they warn me that 1, the Back-To-School Season starts as soon as the school year ends, meaning now, and 2, the Back-To-School Season is their busiest season. They’re obviously worried I’ll find it overwhelming, but I love the fast pace; the busier the day is, the faster it goes, after all.

After I’ve been there for less than a month, I’m checking out a woman with two small kids. Two managers are talking at the print center counter several yards away. The woman’s little girl absolutely cannot keep still. She’s not messing up anything, just jumping all over the place and chatting away, obviously annoying her nice but harried mother.

Finally, she just takes off her shoes, which, for some reason, I find hilarious, but I restrain my laughter. After the mother finishes paying and gathering her bags, I find the way she sighs and says, “Okay, put your shoes back on,” even more hilarious; it’s taking all my willpower not to laugh, but I successfully hold it in, not wanting to offend her.

Fortunately, the entrance is right by my register. As soon as the door closes behind them, I burst out laughing so hard, I double over, clutching my stomach. As I stand up, one of the managers hurries over to me, looking frantic.

Manager: “Are you all right?”

Me: “I’m fine.”

The manager lets out a sigh of relief.

Manager: “Oh, we thought you were crying.”

Me: “What? No, I was laughing, I’m sorry.”

Manager: “Oh, good. That’s all we need: another cashier breaking down. It’s too early in the season for crying.”

I never did break down or cry, although, before I graduated and left, I gasped in horror when I heard how a customer threw a hard drive at my manager’s head.

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