I’ll Have The Most Expensive Nothing On The Menu

(My dad and I are driving through Maryland and stop at a 24 hours diner around 10 pm.)

Waitress: *handing us menus* “So, what can I get you?”

Dad: “Oh, I don’t know. What’s good here?”

Waitress: “Nothing, really.”

Dad: “So, I guess we should go eat somewhere else, huh?”